a song of pores

Right now, at this very moment,  I am in Singapore. A brief 3 day stop before going on to Australia.

The flight was pretty fine and painless, I quickly fell for the flight attendants who were all very very pretty.
I spent most of the time watching movies, pretending to be interested in what Stian had to say, and listening to music.
A 12 hour flight doesn’t have to be that bad really. 
The airport in Singapore was cool, they had plants inside the terminal. Huge palm trees even, inside !

We were picked up by Uncle Singapore. His real name is Yngvar, but he’s John-Sverre’s uncle, and lives in Singapore so… Uncle Singapore then.
Later that day we went for a BBQ at his place. They had these delicious meatsticks that surely must have been marinated in Unicorn Tears, or Angel Blood. I’m honestly not sure but they were damn good. 
We also went sightseeing, and saw some things. It was okay, I’m not much of a sightseeing guy, it feels like forced tourism. Just doesn’t feel natural.

In related news; My mind was nearly shattered by the jetlag. I could swear we’ve been here for days, but it’s still only our second day. If I dont get used to it soon, I will surely perish under the mental strain. Although thanks to my good sleep last night I think I’ll be quite fine.

So far my impression of this country is awesome, they have vanilla coke. A delicious, misunderstood drink I never thought I’d see again. The asian channels on TV air crazy tv-shows and soap operas. You haven’t heard anything until you’ve heard a japanese lamentation. The ladies here are also exquisite, at atleast one occasion I have had to tape my eyelids shut to not lose what I have left of my sanity.  

And now, for your enjoyment; a photograph of the guys. Left to right; Stian, John-Sverre and Tukun.

unemployed turkey kills bachelorette with suitcase

A few days ago I had my last day of work. It was sad, so sad. It’s a sad sad situation. 
When someone quits, they usually hang their badge up on the wall. Kind of like a shrine to fallen comrades, or deserters. Which I guess is more appropriate, since very few people actually die at that job.

As I’ve said before the people who work there are a bunch of cool cats. In fact so cool, they gave me cake. Which we all ate to the delight of our digestive systems. We had a slightly longer break, and tok the time to ponder on how the Bachelor would be if all the contestants were crackwhores.  The conversation drifted on towards other crazy, yet brilliant, ideas. But that’s for another day. (Battle Royal with nymphomaniacs anyone?)

I can’t keep myself from wondering everyday; “How did the guys at work do today? Hm..”
They’ll have to keep me updated, if I’m expected to get any sleep at night.

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In other news, we had a family dinner tonight. I ordered the BBQ’d Turkey. It was damn good.  I’m going to try to cut back on meat this year. Unless of course the meat in question is incredibly delicious.

If someone said to me; “I am going to kill you, but from your flesh I will conjure the most delicious meal ever known to man”, I would probably let him. Take that vegetarians. 

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In other other news (I think this is an indicator of me not updating often enough), I’m pretty much done packing. Just need to edit my suitcase; removing some things, adding some more. I think I need to ditch some of my trousers, I don’t think i’ll need all 5. 11 t-shirts might also be too much. It’s hard to imagine what you’ll need for a whole year.

A little something on compulsive hoarding

I am really really bad at getting rid of things. Some people are just like that, I cant throw stuff out.
I always think I’ll have some use for it in the future.
I’ve been cleaning out my room the past few days, packing some stuff. I honestly think half of my room’s space is taken up by junk.

Did I really say junk? No, what I really meant was… Treasure. 

My greatest treasure is probably my old schoolstuff. I have kept most of my notes, tests and pretty much anything else I was ever graded on. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Neatly collected in a series of binders. These ones ranging from the 8th to 13th grade. There is more, chucked away in my closet in huge bags. I really need to organize these.  It was fun, almost eerie to see stuff I had written years ago, so many tests failed.. so many aced. 

Digging deeper into the cluttered abyss I found stuff like comic books, old games and systems.  It’s a nostalgic trip down memory lane.

Other things I found were:
-And old collection of dice
-Pogs
-Pokemon cards
-And old sample bag of coffee (which I’ve kept for some reason, and I don’t intend to throw away)
-All my report cards
-Every issue of Norw. PlayStation Magazine. (and most of the PS2 magazines) 
-Lots of pc peripherals (most of them not working)

The list goes on and on into the obscure, will it ever end? 
In other, not so related, news. I got me some new sneakers today.
And I made some fanart to celebrate.

the msn the world forgot

On a poor recommendation from Tukun I decided to download and try Msn 9.0.
This event set loose a chain of events that would lead to relentless frustration and confusion.

The problem was that Msn 9 is horrible. It has this weird annoying design and I instantly longed for my old msn with the custom black color. It didn’t take long for me to start looking for the old install file, but of course it was long gone. So I had to download it again. The odd thing was.. that the internet had almost seemed to condemn and forget its existence. Like an enforced disappearance it was nowhere to be found.

The first file I found turned out to be msn 7.0. That won’t do it. I found several other downloads that swore to be msn 8.5. Either the install file didn’t work, or it was actually msn 8.0, or like one of the versions, which was in Spanish. I would have rolled with it, but it also turned out to be a non-working install.

It took me a total of 7 tries, that’s 7 downloads to get it right. That’s how stubborn I am.

It was like some weird Twilight Zone episode.  Msn 8.5 is arguably one of the best msn releases, but now good luck finding it.

Still though, this msn 8.5 i settled on doesn’t have the cool color options my old one had. So no more slick black msn for me I guess.

For those interested, here is the one I found (via mess.be)

ding to the world

Looks like we’re about to ding 2009.
Good lord, 1999 doesn’t seem so distant.

Let’s look back shall we.

The Matrix was released in theatres (yeah, seems like yesterday doesn’t it?)
And so was Star Wars Ep. 1 (I guess we’re all still trying to forget about that one)
The Sega Dreamcast was released in EU and US.
Family Guy premiered on Fox. (the first season sucked)

I could go on and on. 10 years ago on this day I was in some hellhole in Tijuana doing coke off some crossdressing hooker.

Seriously though, I believe I’ve managed to uphold last year’s new years resolution. 

This years resolution will be hard to define, as I well spend most of this year in some hellhole in Australia doing coke off some crossdressing hooker.
I’ll try to make new friends, be they hookers or not.

Nevertheless, here’s hoping for survival and upholding sanity, for a new year.

i believe a swag report is in order

‘Tis xmas, and happy holidays to you and you and you.

It was a good one indeed, I ate so much I honestly began to worry for my wellbeing.
During every festive meal me and my brother compete at who can eat the most, measured by number of plates. I won this time, at 2 and a half. I topped it off with two slices of cake. I won alright.. but at what price? I like to think it was worth it, to send my brother down the spiral of shame, fueled by his crushing defeat. 

What other part of xmas is important? 
Jesus? Hell no.
It’s the swag. Or loot if you will. And this years outcome? Purple.

Presenting X-Mas swag report of 2008:

Wacom Bamboo Drawing tablet.

Olympus Digital Camera

Charles Dickens Collection DVD

Documentary on the Norwegian Resistance during WW2

Darth Vader Bobble-Head

The Game, by Neil Strauss

A wallet type-dealy

A dragon type statue dealy

After Eight

Cash

Additional notes;
The bobble-head situaton was pretty funny, I bought my brother the same thing. Although I got him a Clone Trooper, and he got me a Darth Vader.
After Eight is something I get every year from my mother, probably for as far back as I can remember. To me, After Eight smells like x-mas.

As a little treat for my faithful reader (non plural intended), a drawing I did with my Wacom tablet. 

 

 

let’s take a giant crap on a classic movie

Have y’all seen Lady and The Tramp?

A classic Disney movie, truly it is.
Surely it would only be fitting that Disney would be the one to defecate on this all time favorite.
I’m sure there is some odd forest animal that poops on it’s young, maybe to keep them warm. I don’t know.
Either way, Disney is just like this animal.

BEHOLD, AND TREMBLE IN HORROR

 

Disney and Paris Hilton’s bastard lovechild.

the crow remake

 

I hated that movie, and now. . they’re gonna remake it? What the hell?!

perfection defined?

I have seen the end. The end of all beings, the end of all suffering and ultimately . . the end of all joy.

Last night I had a dream, there were many things going on.  I can’t even recall the narrative of the dream itself, the only detail I remember was eating that juicy hamburger. It wasn’t just a normal burger, it had juicy sauces and two, yes two meat patties. And in the middle? A big STEAK. Tripple meat action. My god it was the biggest burger I’ve ever seen. I wasn’t the only person eating there, everyone was consuming some sort of otherworldly adaption of their favorite food. Lasagna, spaghetti, pies. . . each of these foods at their highest point of evolution, perfected by some celestial being.
I’m sure my cries of joy were audible in the silent night.
When I suddenly awoke all I could do was realize what a cold and dark place the real world is, without the shining beacon of hope. Juicy meaty hope.
I sat in my bed for hours and cried . .   tears of barbeque sauce.

dear facebook users

Take a hint.

Why would I want a 3D-puppy? There is something wrong with you people.