unemployed turkey kills bachelorette with suitcase

A few days ago I had my last day of work. It was sad, so sad. It’s a sad sad situation. 
When someone quits, they usually hang their badge up on the wall. Kind of like a shrine to fallen comrades, or deserters. Which I guess is more appropriate, since very few people actually die at that job.

As I’ve said before the people who work there are a bunch of cool cats. In fact so cool, they gave me cake. Which we all ate to the delight of our digestive systems. We had a slightly longer break, and tok the time to ponder on how the Bachelor would be if all the contestants were crackwhores.  The conversation drifted on towards other crazy, yet brilliant, ideas. But that’s for another day. (Battle Royal with nymphomaniacs anyone?)

I can’t keep myself from wondering everyday; “How did the guys at work do today? Hm..”
They’ll have to keep me updated, if I’m expected to get any sleep at night.

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In other news, we had a family dinner tonight. I ordered the BBQ’d Turkey. It was damn good.  I’m going to try to cut back on meat this year. Unless of course the meat in question is incredibly delicious.

If someone said to me; “I am going to kill you, but from your flesh I will conjure the most delicious meal ever known to man”, I would probably let him. Take that vegetarians. 

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In other other news (I think this is an indicator of me not updating often enough), I’m pretty much done packing. Just need to edit my suitcase; removing some things, adding some more. I think I need to ditch some of my trousers, I don’t think i’ll need all 5. 11 t-shirts might also be too much. It’s hard to imagine what you’ll need for a whole year.

Bus Drivers Are Made Of Shit

Before I get to the main topic of my rant, let me tell you what a good day I had yesterday. At work I recruited 5 members so I felt pretty good about myself. Even of the people I didn’t recruit most of them were pretty nice people.

Yesterday, I felt overwhelmed with good fortune. Today however, my luck needed to be balanced.

Usually when I get on the bus, be it morning or evening, the driver simply glances at my buspass and lets me walk on by to sit down. They rarely pay special attention to any validity the card may have, it’s somewhat of a silent agreement between passenger and driver. Kind of a mutual trust, they trust we don’t sneak on the bus, and we trust he won’t drive us off a cliff because he’s having a bad day.

But today the busdriver decided to scrutinize my pass. He noticed that the date I had written on it didn’t correspond with the date that had been stamped on it. These dates are stamped on the first trip you take with a new card. I told the driver; “I know they don’t correspond, they never do.” I went on to tell him every busdriver who ever stamped my card has never stamped the current date. He then went through all my old passes and said “None of these stamps correspond”, I told him again.. “I know. They never do!” He found it fair to confiscate my card, due to his colleagues screwups, which have apparently gone unnoticed for years, as he is the first one to point this out.

Based on this experience I have come to the conclusion that busdrivers are complete idiots, who can’t do their jobs right. And the one person who did do his job right, decided to be a dick about it.

Thank you karma for balancing my luck, you prick.
Let me finish this off with another haiku.

Useless busdrivers
Tomes of pure incompetence
Do your god damn job

don’t worry, i’m soulstoned

Long time no post, nobody cares.

Since we last spoke, you and me, I finished school (for now) and I received a B on my student film. I am pleased.

I spent many moons slacking, until a few weeks ago when I got a job. If you know me very well, you are probably laughing. Hold your mockery until I tell you what job I have.

I’m a recruiter for Amnesty International. It’s like telemarketing, but I work on the streets, kicking it real with my homies. Face2Face, as the project is called.

I’m not a very outgoing person, you know this. In many cases I’d rather cut my tongue off than speak to a stranger, and that’s why this job is good for me. Until recently I was pretty damn useless at it too, but I’ve been improving this week. The best part of the job is the people though. No, not the countless people on the street who reject us, but the people I work with. They are all awesome, barely any assholes at all.

So if you see us in the street, take a minute to talk. You will be enlightened and our spirits will be lifted.

In other news, my internet connection has been unstable due to thunderstorms. But it’s better now.

I’ve been hanging out a lot at GiantBomb.com lately, its a pretty cool site.

Opeth’s new album rules.

I have a cat, she is awesome.

I shot the sheriff.